Haywire's pedaling away, still on that kid's bike, still sporting that football helmet and still wearing his blaring white Whack Shack jumpsuit. And no one's taken notice of him? Seriously? Is every Midwesterner on this show on crack? Don't be offended people, I'm from the Midwest and I'm not on crack. No sirree! It's all legal drugs for me. Legal, legal! Wheee! Um, so Haywire hasn't been spotted 'cuz everyone around him is in some sort of drug-induced stupor (I'm guessing). He breaks into a fast food joint, via the drive-thru window (and I've seen that done, but I won't give you a name, 'cuz that would be tattling), and proceeds to chow down. A coupla teens arrive to open (and make-out) and they spot Haywire so he hustles.
Tooele. "Ranch is gone, Michael," Linc monotones. Way to state the obvious, Deputy Downer. Michael ignores this and orders T-Bag to recall the map he ingested. T-Bag mouths off and Michael Oh. So. Hotly. Gets. In. His. Face. I mean he gets shouty and sweaty and it's just...sigh. And the amount of drugs that I'm currently taking have nothing to do with my reaction. Linc's reaction is rather amusing, he just sighs and shrugs, like a dad who's resigned himself to the fact that the kids are gonna bicker the entire trip. Anyway, Michael (hotly) reminds T-Bag that if he can't remember the map he's of no use to them. Oh, and Newbie's still in the trunk. Heh.
So the guys get outta the car and try to reconstruct the ranch. T-Bag's tryin', but, as he puts it, he's "not RainMan." Heh.
Inspector Insanity Mahone meets with a fed who originally worked the DB case way back when.
The guys put their heads together and figure out where the silo was. Michael believes the stash is sitting under a garage. They're about to check it out when a hot housewife exits the home to retrieve a paper. T-Bag suggests he off her, but Michael shoots that idea down. Linc works his Scofield Smart Gene, gets "an idea" and they head out 'cuz he needs supplies. Go Linc!
They send Newbie on an errand: get a list of supplies from that hardware store and fill up the car. "And David," Michael warns, "don't screw this up." Should I add that they let him out of the trunk to accomplish this or can you guys figure it out?
Northern Utah. Sucre's motorcycling and zzz...Sorry, it's the storyline, not the drugs. I swear. Maybe. Anyhoo, Sucre comes upon a hitchhiking C-Note. "You walk here?" Tee hee hee! Okay, I'll admit that the drugs were involved in my reaction to that, but Amaury Nolasco's line delivery was perfect. C-Note (Damn! Rockmond Dunbar's got amazing arms!) just asks for a ride and shows Sucre the map he downloaded from that chick's laptop.
Posse Central. Okay, since we haven't seen or heard from Mahone's right-hand man in many a episode I'm just going to assume that he's in a corner somewhere, crying 'cuz Mahone chewed him up and spit him out. So this bespectacled fed, who's been in the past several episodes has officially become Mahone's Agent Right-Hand Man #2. So, anyway, Agent R-HM#2 brings Mahone up to speed on the Haywire spotting (in Wisconsin-guess the people were in a cheese-induced stupor) and Mahone tells him to hand it off to local authorities. He wants everyone working the DB case. After Mahone ends the call, he asks DB Fed about Jenkins, a guy who saw DB on the day of the hi-jacking.
Cut to Doc, opening an envelope containing another origami bird. Ooh, looky at the pretty birdy. Can he fly? Fly away, pretty birdy, fly away! Sorry (again). There's another disconnected number written on this bird.
Washington. From pretty birdy to pretty bitchy. Owen's reporting to SAM and is not happy about it. Not one bit. He's mighty petulant when he demands to see Pres Patricia (she's on another show now, Owen). SAM says Owen needs to stay on the sidelines until the Burrows thing is taken care of. "You report to me now, and only me." Burn!
As Owen's retreating with his tail tucked between his legs, GJH spots him.
Newbie's shopping when Mr. CM's friend comes by to check on him. Friend spots the evidence of the scuffle and whips out his cell to call the sheriff. While he's on hold, he hears Mr. CM making noise. Whack! Newbie conks him with a shovel.
While Linc fiddles with an electric box, T-Bag ookily eyes HH through a window. Michael warns him to behave and T-Bag says he can play nice.
Score one for Newbie. Well, I guess it should be up to 2 1/2: punching Bellick last season, banging SDJ and now he's succeeding in getting those supplies the boys needed. But Linc picks up that Newbie's acting weird...er than usual. His impressive chest gets Newbie to spill about what happened at the hardware store and Linc says they have to get moving.
Cut to HH opening her door to a jumpsuited Michael. "Sorry to bother you ma'am, is your electricity out?"
Mahone meets with Jenkins and asks him about some discrepancies in his statements. Did DB fill up his car at 7 am or 7 pm? "Both." Ooh, Mahone's got himself a lightbulb! One with those twittering, cartoon birdies circling it, but a lightbulb nevertheless.
Back to Michael and HH. He electro babbles something. Long story short: HH agrees to let him and his crew dig up the garage.
Mahone channels his inner RainMan and puts his mad math skillz to work. He comes up with a 64 mile perimeter and figures that Westmoreland stashed the money somewhere inside that circle. He guesses that's where the Escapees are.
HH's garage. Even in a stolen jumpsuit, Linc's shirt is open. Did he forget how to do buttons in prison? I'm high and I can still button my clothes. Not that I'm complaining, look at the shiny, manly chest. Rrrr! ANYWAY, Newbie enters with Sucre and C-Note who greets Michael, "Whassup, Snowflake?"
After commercials, Michael has a tantrum about the two stragglers ruining the con on HH. C-Note basically tells him to blow it out his ass (and what a pretty ass it it). They get to work. HH interrupts to ask if anyone would like a drink. After they decline she jiggles back inside (seriously she's in a hot pink tank and TENNIS SKIRT). T-Bag decides he should go keep her occupied.
Haywire's on foot and spots a squad car so he ducks into a blind old lady's house. "Billy, is that you?" "Yup."
So T-Bag's making with the flirty, flirty and HH is supplying the booze. He recognizes her perfume and HH asks if an ex used to wear it. T-Bag says yeah, and Woah! Robert Knepper manages to convey loathing, resentment, betrayal and a host of other emotions with just one look. He can go from oddly charming to sicko scary in a second flat. If I were HH, I'd be long gone.
Back in the garage, Michael brings up Maricruz, but Sucre doesn't want to talk about it. Good, neither do we. Michael tells him about europeangoldfinch.net, a site where he can post messages if he ever gets into trouble. Linc gets to the silo's foundation and Michael says once they find the moolah (my word, not his), they'll hop in the car and get outta Dodge. Newbie's all, "Yeah, about that? I sorta forgot to gas up the car." Michael oozes sex appeal when he says he's not about to drive back through town with a trunk filled with millions. He orders Newbie to gas up the car now. Newbie loudly complains, but Linc's luxurious sheen of sweat sends him on his way.
The old lady figures out that Haywire is not Bobby and dials 911.
Mahone's in Tooele, questioning the sheriff who isn't the least bit concerned that two of his citizens are missing. In his defense, Mr. CM and his friend have been known to blow off work and go boar hunting. Anyhoodle, Mahone spots blood on the floor of the hardware store and tosses a potted plant through the window. He finds the two bound-and-gagged men.
A couple of cops enter the old lady's house to find her unharmed.
T-Bag is telling HH about Single Mom from last season (or 3 years ago in the Prison Break timeline). His tales turn HH into Hot Horny Housewife, but Wait! Turns out she's not interested in him, but in, "that big guy, the strong guy that doesn't speak much." Heh. It's the chest that pulled her in. Such a pretty chest. All sweaty and shiny. T-Bag doesn't look like he takes rejection well. Run HHH, run!
Doc gets a call from GJH who warns her that Owen isn't who he says he is. He says he's flying back to Chicago and that he's found out some other things. "You were right." About what? Well, they don't finish their conversation 'cuz Doc turns and AAAIIEEE! there's Owen, all sinister smiles and ulterior motives.
Newbie's at a gas station and smells something fishy. He makes a run for it as several cars, including Mahone, give chase. Damn, Newbie can seriously haul ass! Mahone chases him on foot and corners the lad. He presses his gun (dirty!) against Newbie's head and asks where the others are. Newbie doesn't respond and I don't blame him. Having weapons pressed into my skull tends to render me speechless as well. Anyway, Mahone persists, "Where. Are. They?"
Back to the garage, C-Note complains that T-Bag should be digging too. So Michael heads inside where he sees some broken glass on the table. He flies upstairs and bursts into HHH's bedroom. She's just standing there and asks what the hell he's doing. Can you say awkward? T-Bag strolls over and says, "she's got the hots for the big, strong one." Michael apologizes for barging in, saying they'll just finish up and get out of her way. But HHH is pissed and says they're done. She wants them outta there now!
Downstairs the diggers hear a car pull up and Sucre checks it out. A chick cop gets out of her car and walks up to the house. HHH, Michael and T-Bag see this from the window. HHH makes to leave the room, but T-Bag puts a little pick-axe to her throat. Michael, of course, doesn't like this development, but what are you gonna do? (source)